Writer's Block

There is too much going on
to know what to write about
so many live at risk
so many thoughts pondering in my head
I sit down to think
but then my anxiety and depression accelerate
to the point where I don't feel anything at all
I am taught to sit, shut up and attempt to look pretty
because my identity looks trendy
it is a good picture to showcase that
a system is not racist and cissexist on the outside
but on the inside, the slurs and death stares kick in
people following me around at night
wondering what could really happen to me
I am not exotic, I am exhausted
From the tyranny
from the constant fear
I am allowed to be tired
to find spaces instead of creating them
to lay down in a river and shut my eyes
to take my pain and turn it into words
that create meaning for me
words that save me when socializing can't

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