Lay Me Down

If I die tomorrow,
I will be a mixed bag
though not myself
I grew each and every day 
More aware much stronger

If I die tomorrow, 
tell my mother that I love you
for caring me
loving me
clothing me
for transforming me into the person that I am
I wanted to tell you that I am sorry
for not being the son that you always wanted 
the expectations set I did not meet
for not being honest 

If I die tomorrow,
tell my lover that I love you
tell them that there is a spirit inside him
that keeps me closer to them
their calm aura
and laugh out loud moments

If I died tomorrow,
I want to swim in the ocean the night before
let the waves sift through my veins
sooth my nerves
and remind me of what the world can be
endless ocean and crisp sky

I would leave this world in a messy state
a system that neglects my poc siblings 
my life and others are of less value than others 
I hope that society is stripped down of its patriarchal state 
then we can live to express our culture and identity
rather conforming in shame

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